Trouble finding the right words

I found out some troubling news over the weekend.  A woman I had worked with for roughly 12 years passed away Friday.  Coincidentally, it was the cashier from this story.

She and I didn’t really have a relationship outside of work, but we worked together and I supervised her for the better part of the 12 years we worked together.  She was an extremely happy woman.  She always has a smile upon her face.  She always said hello.  She always asked me how the twins were doing.  And, yes, she even apologized to me in the story linked above because a customer treated me like shit.  That was the kind of woman she was.  You could search this Earth for eternity and not find one person who would have anything derogatory to say about her.

Her funeral was today.  I hate going to funerals.  I loathe seeing dead bodies, but I wanted and needed to pay my respects to this wonderful woman.  By the time I had gotten to the funeral home, there was already a long line nearly busting through the doors.  It took nearly 20 minutes for me to get to the casket.  During that time I spoke to her great-nephew and sister, both of whom I had worked with.  I gave them my condolences and a hug.

I spent most of my time agonizing over what to say to this coworker’s daughter when I reached her.  I wanted to say something profound, something to let her know just how wonderful her mother was.  But eventually I realized I didn’t need to.  Her daughter would know much more than I that her mother was a wonderful woman.

So I eventually reached the casket.  I looked down upon her and said my goodbye.  Then her daughter spoke to me and asked me if I had worked with her.  I confirmed that I had and all I could think of to say was that I was sorry for her loss.  I wanted to say something to console or comfort her, but I fumbled my words and could barely talk.  I didn’t know what to say to her daughter.  What do you say to someone who just lost their mother?

What I can safely say is that Heaven is now a little brighter and a better place because she’s there.  Rest in peace, Betty, you will be missed.


About Twindaddy (337 Articles)
Sometimes funny. Sometimes serious. Always genuine.

5 Comments on Trouble finding the right words

  1. You don’t have to say anything profound. Your presence at the funeral will bring her comfort. And I imagine her daughter is not yet in a place where she would remember a profound statement, anyway.

    I was going to write about this subject tonight, actually. A close friend of mine learned today that her husband’s cancer, that they though had stopped, is now in his lungs and his liver. Guess it’s a sad day all around.

    Sorry for the loss of your friend/coworker.


    • Thank you. It is a sad day, indeed.

      It’s tough to find the right words in situations as these. I’m sitting here trying to find some appropriate words to convey in regards to your friend’s husband, but I have nothing.

      Cancer is truly a horrible disease and it always seems to take the people who rarely deserve it.


  2. lamehousewife // February 27, 2012 at 9:30 pm // Reply

    this is such a beautifully authentic post…God bless


  3. You honor your colleague with your compassion and love, my friend.


  4. Betty truly was a great woman. Even after my wife and I stopped working there, her face lit up with a smile every time we were in there. She will definately be missed.


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