The birds and the bees

That awkward moment when you explain to your children what sex is and what its purpose is.

I had that talk – separately – with the twins this weekend.  I’ve been meaning to for a while, but I was trying to find a copy of video my mom showed me when I was just a bit older than they were.  That wasn’t easy.

The video – Where Did I Come From? – is an animated video that explains the reproduction process in a slightly lighthearted manner.  It explains what body parts do what and goes from conception all the way to birth.

Before I let them watch the video, I talked to them and asked them what they knew about sex. If they were telling the truth, they didn’t know much.

Boy, talk about awkward.  I almost didn’t do it, but it needed to be done.  They confirmed my suspicions that other kids at school are talking about sex so felt somewhat vindicated for broaching the subject.

Anyhow, they watched the video individually.  I asked them both if they had questions afterwards and they obviously said no.

I explained to them that I know they’re getting to the age when they’re interested in girls – Baby A’s girlfriend showed up unexpectedly just a few moments after our discussion – and that they need to understand what sex is and what the consequences are.  I also told them that if I’m a grandfather before I’m 40 lives will be lost.

I didn’t get into STD’s and contraception yet.  I didn’t want to overwhelm them.  We’ll tackle that at a later date.

All these years it never occurred to me that this talk would be just as awkward as the parent as it is as the child.

About Twindaddy (337 Articles)
Sometimes funny. Sometimes serious. Always genuine.

10 Comments on The birds and the bees

  1. southerndreamer // April 30, 2012 at 7:05 pm // Reply

    Good job! Mine plied me w/tons of questions, but that is the nature of our relationship. They discovered early on that Mom knows TONS of stuff and it takes a whole heck of a lot to ruffle, piss off, or embarrass Mom. I hope they remember that in a few years when the hormone overload short circuits logic.


    • I was encouraging questions but none were forthcoming. I’ll keep bringing it up and I’ll eventually get to the other stuff shortly. I don’t know if they still teach sex-ed in school, but I’d rather they learn it from me than from state mandated agenda taught by a likely inadequate teacher.


  2. You bring back great memories. Some from over 20 years ago and some from about 3 weeks ago. Let me splain.
    I have 4 kids… two boys, ages 30 & 33 and 2 girls, ages 5 & 9. That is not a misprint. The talk with the boys wasn’t too bad. the talk with the oldest daughter was very easy. My wife had it with her! bwahahahahaha I feel where you’re coming from, however. just remember, the hard part of “The Talk” is out of the way. They’ll learn most of the rest of the basics of the birds and the bees from their friends. 🙂
    Good stuph.


  3. Good for you to do it in a planned rational way. My husband and I decided he’d do this talk and I’d get Santa. But Jacob announced “Tommy told me something today, but I don’t think he got it right” to me as I was backing out of a particularly tight parking spot. I didn’t hit anything and answered the question. Somehow! (I ended up with Santa, too. Sigh.)


    • Well, I felt that I should do it. A few years ago the kids were a bit confused and thought that God was literally their father (cause the Bible tells me so) and they were apparently arguing over who their father was. They were adamant that God created them and therefore must be their father and when they asked how I could be there father she lost her temper and screamed, “Cause mommy and daddy had sex!” They were 7….

      So, yeah, I felt that the burden should fall on me here…


  4. I feel you. You are better than I am though. I wouldn’t give my boys the word, “vagina”. Are you kidding me? I was not giving them another word to call each other and giggle. We waited though for them to show signs. I also don’t remember anyone having “the talk” with me, we had farm animals.


    • Well, I was afraid if I waited for signs it would be too late. I remember learning a great deal that I wasn’t prepared for from other kids at school when I was their age and I’d rather them learn from me even though its awkward talking to them about it.


      • Oh totally. Each kid is different. I was the kid who told you how your mom ACTUALLY got the baby in the belly. I don’t know if you saw my posts, “Aren’t you glad you only had to do that twice to get three kids?” and “The place between where the babies come out. -Said by a highly intelligent mother” Our boys were in fifth grade when we had the talk and it seems to be about the time kids at school start talking about sex.


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