Oh, That Smell!

The smell of death surrounds youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, yeah

A couple of days ago an unpleasant stench began to slowly permeate my car. At first I couldn’t quite identify the noisomeness, but it was quite faint so I didn’t worry too awfully much about it. Friday morning the smell was a bit stronger and seemed to be coming from the air conditioning vents. Again, it was tolerable so I didn’t think much about it. Plus, I was running late for work and was worried more about my lead foot and not hitting other cars.

Friday evening the stench was beginning to become oppressive. The funk still seemed to be coming through the vents and the only reason I didn’t turn off the air and roll down the windows is because it was 95 effin’ degrees outside and I’d rather deal with the smell than dehydrate in the brutal heat. When I picked up the twins after work one of them asked me what the smell was. I told them I didn’t know, but I suspected that an animal had crawled up into the engine and died. I’ve seen this happen before and actually have had to fish a family of dead mice out of an air filter casing before. That was…unpleasant.

Saturday morning the kids and I piled into the car to go to the grocery store. The stench was still strong and, frankly, quite suffocating. But to my immense relief I figured out what was causing the unpleasant aroma in the grocery store parking lot.

It seems that if you buy a gallon of milk and forget to take it out of your trunk after you went shopping the weekend before the milk spoils and makes you think there’s a dead animal in your engine somewhere. I know! I was shocked, too!

 

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So, yeah. Oops. After we got home and put all of the groceries away (including a new, unspoiled gallon of milk), I febreezed the fuck out of my trunk and threw away everything that had gotten soaked with spoiled milk. I haven’t been back in the car since, but I’m hoping that did the trick.

 

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About Twindaddy (330 Articles)
Sometimes funny. Sometimes serious. Always genuine.

64 Comments on Oh, That Smell!

  1. Bwahahahaha…and Ew. Yesterday, I somehow managed to lock my car key in my car. It had dislodged and was sitting in the driver seat. I could swear that I heard it laughing at me.

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  2. TD, that is wicked gross. But funny all the same. I don’t have any stories, my life is drab. Maybe I’ll come back with one another time. Don’t shoot me. 🙂

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  3. I had 2 cantaloupes roll out of the bag and do the same in my car. Unfortunately, we didn’t find it until maggots arrived and the smell got so bad I had to find it. We had fruit flies for a week and the smell is still faintly in the trunk when you open the door. I am going to check out anything I don’t find once I put groceries away instead of forgetting. Ugh!

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  4. This should be easy yet I can surprisingly not think of anything like this haha. Good fathering skills , though , don’t worry about it kids. I got this.

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  5. Good luck, buddy – on all counts!

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  6. Now that’s funny!

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  7. Well, at least it was milk and not an actual body or something…

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  8. Oh, ouch. You win.

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  9. Yeah, I know that routine, too. Still….ew…

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  10. My husband left 5 lbs of raw chicken under the seat of our car, where it proceeded to swell, bake, and weep, unencumbered, for the next 5 days in the sunny driveway of our Los Angeles bungalow.
    A call to a disaster-clean-up specialist made it all better. He said he’s cleaned up after dead bodies that smelled not quite as bad. On a hot day, you can still sense the faint aroma of death, but it just sorta reminds me of our fragile existence. And that shit happens.

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  11. Well now…. that is adding injury to insult. I am sitting on the toilet just now. A stay made longer because I had to comment.

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  12. Heavens to Betsy that sounds foul. I regularly do stupid things. I blame my hair colour and the fact that glasses only make you look smart, they don’t actually help your intelligence

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  13. I know semi-mildewed car after leaving the windows down in the rain cannot top dead milk.

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  14. I knew a girl when I was young… she kept smelling a horrible smell no one else smelled. It took months, but they found out she had somehow sniffed an artificial doll hair into her nose and it was rotting in the moisture in there. They got it out somehow.

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  15. I’m glad you used Febreeze and not some horrible car air freshener. My mom somehow managed to lose a whole watermelon in her trunk (I don’t know), and it went bad. The air freshener she got was probably worse than the rotting watermelon smell.

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  16. You aren’t alone….similarly, one time I left hamburger meat in the car for a few days and was certain something had died. I didn’t realize what it was until we wanted to make burgers.

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  17. One of my kids stuffed a bag of half-eaten mcdonalds under the seat once. Weeks later I discovered the bag, but not which kid. As to the milk, I learned not to put it on the passenger seat and then slam on the brakes when some ijit stops for no reason. The milk jug will hit the dash and milk will explode into the heating vents eventually forcing you to sell the car to get rid of the smell 😉

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  18. I’ve had things growing in the back of the fridge, but it being only me I never had enough shopping to need to open up the back of the car, I just put everything on the front passenger seat or in the footwell and took it in from there. I’m sure I’ve done other stupid things, I just can’t remember them right now.

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  19. I once crashed my truck into my garage… It was early. I was tired. I opened the garage to head to work, and there was trash in front of my truck. Rather than take the 30 seconds to pick it up and walk to the dumpster, in my sleepy logic, I decided I could just drive around it and leave the trash for someone else to deal with. Pull forward, crank the wheel, crunch. Pulled the passenger side of my truck bed right into the frame of my garage door. Oops.

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  20. Still better than the time I tried to carry two gallons of milk home on my bike and one exploded all over me. 🙂

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  21. Oh, I am laughing my ass off!
    YES–this has happened to me, too.
    I think maybe we sold the car 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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