I Lose

“Time to clean up. We’re going to bed soon,” I told Baby C.

“Yes. We’re gonna sleep in Daddy’s bed,” he assured me.

Um, no. “No, you’re gonna sleep in C’s bed.”

He sighed before saying, “Okay.”

Cleaning up, as it always is, was a pain in the ass. C likes to redecorate the living room with his toys, but screams bloody murder when forced to pick them all up. Minutes later, the toys were away and his teeth brushed. I gave him night-night love and laid him down in his bed.

After I turned off the light and retreated into my room he began to wail. I returned to his doorway and flipped on the hallway light.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“I want to sleep in Daddy’s room.”

“No, honey. You need to sleep in your bed.”

“You need to lay on the floor,” he pleaded, gesturing to a spot on the floor beside his bed.

“No. You can sleep by yourself in your bed. You’re a big boy now. And Scout will lay next to you. Is that okay?”

A sigh of resignation escaped between his tiny lips. “Yes.”

“Goodnight, sweetie. I love you.”


I went back to my room and waited for him to start crying again, but I was pleasantly surprised. There were no more cries and he went to sleep all by himself. I allowed myself to think I had come out of the situation victorious. For some reason I’d forgotten just how stubborn my son can be.

It was about 2 in the morning (I’m guessing. I never looked at the clock and that’s what it felt like.) when the ruckus began. I could hear C shaking his baby gate like he was trying to get a confession out of it. He was repeatedly shouting “Daddy! I’m wakey-wakey!”


I trudged over to his door and conceded defeat. Had he been tired, or even showed the slightest bit of fatigue, I’d have put him back in his bed. But noooo, he was wide awake at some ungodly hour during which no human should ever be awake. I picked him up and he immediately pointed toward my bed. He didn’t ask to sleep in my bed. He didn’t even request it. He pointed to it, silently commanding me to convey him to my bed, which is apparently the mecca of places to sleep to him.

I was too tired to fight so I just carried him to my bed and laid him between myself and the wall (so he doesn’t roll off), where he immediately complained about not having a pillow. No, he’s not spoiled at all, why do you ask? Anyhow, I gave him a pillow and went right back to sleep.

This morning I awoke to find that he had done a complete 180 in his sleep. His feet were where his head was supposed to be and vice versa (obviously), which is one of the reasons I’d prefer he slept in his own bed. I have nightmares about the time Baby B was sleeping in bed with me shortly after his mother and I separated and he kicked me in the junk one night. That’s not an event I wish to experience again.

I lost this battle, but the war is far from over. This trooper shall persevere, and he shall prevail. No three-year old will get the best of me. Well, not in the long run. Um, I hope….dammit.

sleeping C

Damn him for being so cute…

About Twindaddy (343 Articles)
Sometimes funny. Sometimes serious. Always genuine.

88 Comments on I Lose

  1. The cutest story and the picture, TD.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am forcefully reminded of the last spirit silently pointing towards Ebeneezer’s tombstone.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. What a cool story, TD!


  4. Friday nights are nights when my 4.5 yo is allowed in my bed to fall asleep. Then her daddy gets her and puts her in her room. We’ve always been insistent on sleeping in her own bed but there are times, she crawls into bed with us anyway. Such is life. I figure she’ll be big soon enough to not even want to sleep in our home, eh.


    • If he wasn’t so active I wouldn’t mind as much, but having been kicked in the junk once by a sleeping child has got me worried about a repeat performance. Plus, that’s MY bed, dammit.


  5. Victory! Muahahahahaha
    Oh, wait, crap.
    Ah, the joyful things I have to look forward to. I’m “so” excited! 😛


  6. I remember wanting to sleep in my parent’s bed as well… For some reason. Maybe because I wasn’t allowed to?


  7. Awwww….I love this story! It reminded me of when my kiddos were babies with 2 a.m. sets of beautiful, alert eyes just waiting to engage a harried adult into horseplay. Keep fighting Storm Trooper–you already know that you’ll miss it after baby C grows up.


  8. Aren’t you used to it by now? Losing, that is. I gave up the hope of winning when Jacob hit the terrible two’s.


  9. Even with the mask I can tell he’s a cutie. I can’t say I blame you for giving in, haha.


  10. My sleep heart bleeds for you. I know this battle all too well – my 10yo would STILL gladly sleep with me every night of the week if allowed. It’s easier to keep her in her own bed during the school year, but summer means the schedule goes off the rails and she ends up in my bed more than I should allow. But like you said, I’m TIRED and sometimes just don’t have it in me to banish her. I figure eventually she’ll be a teenager and would rather die than sleep with her mom but until then the battle rages on…Good luck – may the force be with you!


  11. I know… 😦


  12. Did you ever try to quietly sneak out and sleep in Baby C’s room, purely for the purposes of junk protection?

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Helena Hann-Basquiat // July 22, 2014 at 1:54 pm // Reply

    I’m so glad Penny’s a big girl now. She only crawls into bed with me now when there’s a thunderstorm, at which point I tell her that she’s a grown ass woman and should probably go back to her own bed.


  14. LOL! I think Baby C has learned some Jedi mind power…….. 😉


  15. We call my younger son “the gas” because he expands to fit whatever space he’s in….including our bed from time to time.


  16. awww my oldest slept like that when he was little! he looks just like his daddy! 😉


  17. I don’t blame you for giving in. Uninterrupted sleep trumps sticking to guns but spending half the night awake. Especially on a work day.


  18. Lil stinkers win every time.


  19. Hang on in there, Daddy-o, and enjoy it while it lasts – one day he won’t want to snuggle with you any more :/


  20. Ha! That’s a long journey my friend. When I was still with my ex, her daughter was about 9 years old and every now and then she’d end up in bed with us if she got scared, especially during a thunderstorm. This bugged me somewhat but what could I say? Ha! Then one night it came to a complete and permanent end. My ex slept pretty sound but was often confused immediately after waking. We usually left the drapes open that faced east as we both had to get up early and used the sun as an alarm clock in the summer. One night. after a blistering hot and humid August day, there was a wild thunderstorm with blue sheet lightening during the night. It was on the east side of the house and I awoke when it started. I like storms and was waiting for the next lightening display when I heard the bedroom door squeak open in the dark..The daughter always approached her mother’s side of the bed and I was looking in that direction when an unbelievable crash of thunder shook the house, simultaneous with blue sheet lightening that lit every corner of the room. My ex awoke at this and when she looked up she saw her daughter standing glowing blue and looking down on her and she let out a blood curdling scream that echoed long after the thunder had gone. Then there was complete silence for about 3 secomds as they stared at each other. The daughter turned and said “I think I’ll go back to bed now” and walked out of the room. Bwahahaha! (Sorry) And the daughter never again asked to sleep in our bed.

    They get over it after a while TD – a long while. Ha!


  21. Lol! I was one that said no children in our bed and sure enough the 4 yo gets afraid of the dark and I have a child in the bed with me! She has literally laid on top of me in her sleep! It’s awful, thankfully she is starting to get over her fear and back in her room on most nights 😉


  22. You are being tested, my friend. I’ve been there. Twice! Who’s running the show? That’s what we’re establishing here.


  23. Well played Baby C, well played indeed. I love the pointing finger …. you are trained so well dad. Hahaha!


  24. You are going to get your ass kicked just like you got your junk kicked… HA!


  25. You may have lost the battle but you WILL win the war! He will not be sleeping in your bed when he is in high school (because eeew how embarrassing). I reminded myself of this when, after midnight, my almost 3 year old was running around the house carrying on like a silly bugger and declaring himself not going to bed. “Go to bed J”, “No!”. I feel your pain.

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Eventually, you will win this one but maybe not today.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Sometimes you have to pick your battles.


  28. I remember those days so, so well. I’m so glad they’re over….they won every.single.time.


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