When it comes to my neighbors…I avoid them like the plague.
The folks in the townhouse next to me are not the most intelligent beings I’ve ever encountered. They have a puppy who, obviously, barks at everything. When she does this, kids and adults alike begin yelling at the dog. “Lady! Stop it!” (Yes. They named their dog Lady. How original.) This logic escapes them, but yelling at a barking dog does not shut it up. In fact, it only exacerbates the cacophony. Not only do I get to hear their dog barking maniacally, which I can tolerate, but then I have to listen to the entire family while they scream at the dog. That, I cannot tolerate.
The “man” of that house is also a maintenance man for the complex I live in. Normally, this would be a good thing. In normal circumstances you’d think I’d pass him while taking out the trash or something and be able to tell him I need my shower head replaced because it’s spraying water all over the wall, causing a leak in the bathroom below. But, no. That dude totally forgets and when I see him again he merely scratches his head while meekly telling me he forgot. No problem, Skippy. The shower head was only five bucks and the teflon tape was only a buck. I got this…even though YOU’RE legally required to take care of it.
This guy is one of the biggest morons I’ve ever known. When sewage backed up into my home a few years ago (because some idiot was flushing baby wipes down the toilet) he brought me a dehumidifier and told me that would help get the water out of my carpet.
Have you finished rolling your eyes? There’s another story where that came from.
Last year, Revis (who lives in the same complex as I do) had a dishwasher which wouldn’t drain. Mrs. Revis called maintenance and this moron came over, barely took two steps into the kitchen, and said, “Yup. It’s backed up.” Then he left.
How did he know it was clogged? Does he have x-ray vision? Does he have a super sixth sense? Did he clandestinely consult his crystal ball? Did he have a fortune-teller on speed dial? Inquiring minds want to know.
Anyhow, yeah, I avoid those neighbors. I have neighbors on the other side that I’ve never seen. I know people live there because there are cars parked there and I hear the squeaking every time they turn on a faucet in their house, but I’ve never seen them. Maybe they only come out at night? Maybe it’s Casper and friends? I’m honestly not curious enough to find out.
To be perfectly blunt, I very much an introvert. I don’t go out of my way to meet new people. Meeting new people is an uncomfortable experience for me. I’m not outgoing at all (unless I’m drunk) and I’m never sure how people I don’t know will take me. I’ve had friends tell me that my first impressions leave a lot to be desired. My very sharp sarcasm has had me mistaken for a caustic asshole (which I can occasionally be), so I’m a bit leery around new people.
I guess all this kinda makes me a hermit even though I’m completely surround by people. Ah, well. They’ve made no effort to get to know me either, so that makes us even, right? Right???
This post was sponsored by Finish the Sentence Friday. This week’s prompt was “When it comes to my neighbors…”