Artie Lange and the Racist/Sexist Tweets

Sometimes I really hate the trending section on Facebook. It shows me things I just don’t want to see. When it shows me things that are trending I sometimes question how humanity has survived as long as it has. Seriously, who cares that Lea DeLaria (who?) was arguing with a preacher on a New York City subway? Why is this news?

Then I see things that make me angry. I don’t like me when I’m angry. For instance, just now I saw in the trending area:

Artie LangeComedian goes on graphic, sexually explicit Twitter rant about ESPN anchor Cari Champion

Artie Lange at a FYE in Glendale, California

Artie Lange – unfunny white guy (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My first reaction was, “Who the fuck is Artie Lange?” I clicked on the link and saw his picture. He looks vaguely familiar, but I can’t place him. Then I saw the tweets in question, and began to fume. I dislike the fact that I’m going to replicate what he said here, but without context you guys won’t understand my anger. Here are the tweets:

  1. I want the Chick on First Take to laugh at my white dick!
  2. Here’s the scenario I’m using to jerkoff to chick on First Take I’m T. Jefferson & she’s my slave. She beats the shit out of me & runs free
  3. Then I cum and she’s free! The Happiest ending ever!
  4. Then as reparations I make Skip Baylis my slave!
  5. This is a God Damn mini series!
  6. Your thoughts?
  7. Podcast in 3 weeks
  8. Hey  @CariChampion lets me and you get busy!
  9. I attempt to whip  @CariChampion cuz she disrespected the Jefferson Plantation but she grabs whip & beats me I cum like a fat founding father
  10. After having 8 illegitimate kids together  @CariChampion & I marry at The Knights of Columbus in Linden New Jersey. Prob with that?! F- Off!

What. The. Fuck.

Artie Lange is allegedly a comedian. I qualified that using the word allegedly because there isn’t a damned thing funny in any of the things he said.

Artie is white. Cari is black. These things are offensive to any woman no matter her heritage, but the fact that he thinks it’s funny to fantasize about a black woman being his slave is twisted beyond belief, even in the guise of a joke. Slavery is not funny. Nothing about a person owning another person is funny at all. Not even the “joke” about Skip Bayless being a slave is funny, and I can’t stand that guy.

At what point are men going to stop seeing woman as nothing but a hole to stick their dicks in? Seriously, what’s it going to take? I appreciate a beautiful woman, but I know there’s more to a woman than the way she looks. How would Artie feel if someone were talking to his mother like that? Wikipedia says he has a sister. Would he be laughing if someone were talking to her like that? I highly doubt it. You know why? Brothers are protective of their sisters and no brother would tolerate his sister being talked to in that fashion.

You know what bothers me even more than Artie’s ignorant rant? This…

Newsflash, Artie, racism isn’t okay. Neither is objectifying women. Artie’s lack of contrition is not what’s more upsetting than his original comments, though. The icing on this cake made of ignorance is the support he’s getting. As of this writing, over 13,800 people have liked his status. That’s right, 13,800 people support Artie and his racist, sexist “jokes.” Not only is that maddening, but it’s sad. It’s fucking sad people support the vile things he said. It’s sad that people in the comments are bitching about Artie’s perceived lack of free speech (as to that point – he has not been arrested for his asinine tweets so it appears a lot of people still don’t understand what freedom of speech is). It’s sad that people actually thought his depraved tweets were funny. Everything about this ordeal is just sad.

Artie’s appearance on @midnight was cancelled due to his idiotic “jokes.” Artie is a little pissed off that the “PC police” won another battle. Woe is he who says offensive shit and gets called out on it. It’s almost like he wants us to feel bad that he’s getting lambasted for being abrasive and insensitive.

Yes, Artie, you’re a comedian, which means your “living” is to make us all laugh. Some comedians thrive on making controversial remarks. Some comedians die by them. When you say stupid shit like this you don’t get to point your grubby finger at anonymous “PC groups” because people are offended. What you said was offensive. Your remarks degraded a black woman, reducing her from a successful show host to a sex slave (literally) in your spank bank. Excuse me if I’m not laughing. Most of us aren’t laughing, in fact, so perhaps it’s time to find a new line of work.

About Twindaddy (337 Articles)
Sometimes funny. Sometimes serious. Always genuine.

46 Comments on Artie Lange and the Racist/Sexist Tweets

  1. Uggh. This guy is a creep. Well thank god for facebook purity. I don’t have to see trending 🙂


  2. I am so glad you wrote this. I saw this was trending and at first I confused Artie Lange with Artie Johnson (Is he even still alive)? Anyway, you are right..there is nothing funny about his tweets. They are abusive and breathtakingly disrespectful to that woman…to all women. For him to act like HE is the injured party is insane. What a tool.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. For seriously? This whole situation is depressing. The fact that all those people are “liking” his status is very telling. Well said, although I’m sad it had to even be said.


  4. WOW! I live in the dark most days and seem just to have silly kitty pictures on my FB. The crazy thing were his comments after. He really thought he was talking about his observation about her being gorgeous? Yikes. He’s not funny at all. His words have nothing to do with being or not being PC. As you’ve so eloquently stated, it’s about objectifying another human being. That’s never funny.
    Great post, Scott. You do an awesome job of giving voice to these things.


  5. I can’t even… Fuck this guy and his “humor”.


  6. Im the most anti-pc person there is but his tweets are like stale mayonnaise, something you dont want to imagine much less encounter.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. What.The.Fuck. That about sums it up. I’d call him a piece of shit, but that would be insulting to shit. Ugh.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Indeed. I’m really not sure how this was supposed to be funny or why he’s outraged that people are offended. Maybe he needs to reread the crap he wrote.


  8. This guy is disgusting…

    Liked by 1 person

  9. okay, those tweets where offensive, discussing!
    but unfortunately woman get degraded like that ever so often. sorry but we do know what men talk about with other men! And that is why so many people found this funny and are supporting his status updates! Now I’m not even talking about the racist aspect. I don’t know who either of these people are but it is just discussing……

    Seriously some comedians ain’t funny at all…. I’ve read a couple of blog posts where I think my fellow bloggers would make much better comedians than the idiots who currently do all the comedy. Lucky here our comedians are actually funny, most of the time. (the ones I know of) 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • I figure this guy is scraping the scum from the underside of the barrel (not the bottom– the underside), puking it out, and expecting us to laugh. (And that’s being generous.)

      Liked by 1 person

    • Some people enjoy crude humor. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. Depends on the topic. Degrading another human being, especially using distasteful fantasies about slavery, is among the lowest form of “comedy” I’ve ever seen.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Here by way of Serins… I follow Joanna Schroeder who writes at the Good Men Project, on Twitter, and I was trying to figure out who this Artie dude is. I’m glad I didn’t miss much.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I didn’t know who he was either. Evidently, he used to be a part of the Howard Stern show, which isn’t something I’d put on my resume.


      • This isn’t saying much, but Howard Stern actually has a little more class than this guy. No, really, I think that Howard Stern is no fool, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he winds up lambasting the guy for his… *egregious* error.

        Liked by 1 person

  11. This is why I don’t engage with news – real or ‘trending’. It depresses me and makes my soul hurt.

    For you, and for this, I APPLAUD YOU.



    Liked by 1 person

  12. I had not even heard about this douche canoe until your post and thankfully it looks like I won’t be seeing much of him after HIS posts. I am not a big fan of the special interest groups myself but I do demand that we treat each other with respect. We don’t have to like each other, but we must be respectful of others.


  13. So much violence against women would stop if we were seen as heart and soul and not a## and breast!!

    Thank you for being apart the heroic group of men who don’t see us as objects… play toys! And who spread this message of love and decency to others… especially the young men! They need true… manly… role models!!

    Us women need all the heros we can get! And this woman thanks you TD!!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Loading trucks for a living might just have to be his new career! There is a fine line that one should not cross and although it is blurred at times, to most intelligent compassionate individuals, it is quite clear and they know not to cross it. He needs to invest in a blow-up doll!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. he’s disgusting. and me like, you no like me when me angry.. cross between hulk and cookie monster! haha

    Liked by 2 people

  16. I saw this guy on with Jimmy Fallon one night. He’s a douche. Total pig. And a rude, loud mouthed prick just for good measure. This is only the second time I’ve ever heard his name and I hope it’s the last. I cannot believe he had the audacity it say those things.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. And then people wonder why there’s still wars and hatred in the world. It’s because of people like this who think it’s funny to turn other people into things. What a douchecanoe.


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