Every October 31st millions of us dress up in costumes, make-up, or masks and pretend to be someone or something else. Most of us think it’s fun to pretend to be something other than what we are. What are we saying about ourselves, I wonder, when we think it’s fun to not be ourselves?
The fact is, Halloween is a superfluous holiday. All of us wear masks every day. All of us pretend to be someone we’re not every day. All of us have parts of us we wish to hide.
I’m just as guilty of this as anyone. There are parts of me I don’t share with anyone. There are things I’ve done I want no one to discover. There are feelings and thoughts I have of which I’m ashamed. I try to be as true to myself as possible on a daily basis, but there are still parts of me I keep tucked away.
I don’t like Halloween. I don’t like dressing up. In a society where most of us are already uncomfortable with truly being ourselves, I can’t stand a holiday that encourages us to be something we’re not.
Very recently someone I’ve known for almost a decade lied to me. Repeatedly. I don’t know if this person’s motivations were to spare my feelings or if this person knew they had done something morally questionable, but the fact remains that this person shielded the truth with a mask I know all too well after all this time.
And I’m tired of it. I’m tired of this game we all play with each other. I’m tired of deception. I’m tired of us pretending like none of us sin. I’m tired of us all wearing masks and costumes and being ashamed of who we are. Not a one of us is perfect. All of us have lapses in judgement. All of us make selfish decisions which hurt others. What makes it worse is not acknowledging those times and attempting to hide them behind cloaks of lies.
For years here beneath each post it has said “Always genuine.” I have always been truthful with what I’ve written here but I’ve not always told the entire story. There are feelings I’ve had which I’ve omitted because I’m too ashamed to admit I’ve had them. I’m guilty of shielding certain parts of myself, too, but at least I can say that I don’t make shit up to cover up the parts of me I don’t like.
I’m done with Halloween. And I’m done with people who continue to dress up for Halloween every day of the year. If we can’t respect a person enough to tell them the truth then we don’t respect them at all.