A Neighbor’s Rant

~ Twindaddy

One of the things I love most about Spring and Autumn is the temperature. It’s not too hot and not too cold. It’s juuuuust right. It means I don’t need to turn on the air conditioning or the heater. It means I can open up my windows and let a fresh breeze flow through the house.

Ah, serenity.

Unfortunately, open windows, at least where I live, come with a few downsides. I live literally a few hundred feet away from I-75, so the perpetual hum of interstate traffic is always buzzing in the background.

Occasionally, there are obnoxious children yelling and screaming outside. I can deal with that because, hey, that’s what children do.

There is one thing, however, that really rakes my nails across the chalkboard.
Have you ever gone to pick up a friend or relative (or coworker or someone else just in dire need of a ride)? I have. When I arrive I park my car, get out, and knock on the door of my eventual passenger to let them know I’m there to pick them up.

My neighbors don’t seem to have friends that considerate.

Too many times a car pulls up in front of one of the other townhouses on my block and just lays on the horn. Multiple times. It’s incredibly fucking annoying and mind-blowingly rude.

What if I were asleep? What if my child was taking a nap? What if I were watching my soaps and your incessant horn blaring sounded just as the couple I’ve wanted to get together FOREVER is finally confessing their love to one another?(What? I don’t watch soaps. What???) What if you weren’t an inconsiderate asshole, Mr. Horn Blaring Jackwagon?

Is it really so hard to get out of your car and walk up to the door and knock? Is it really going to ruin your day to get that miniscule amount of exercise? Are you planning to burn those calories another time? Or not at all?

Ever heard of a cell phone? For real, if you’re too lazy to get out of your fucking car and knock on a damned door then just text or call the person you’re there to pick up and stop shattering the neighborhood’s serenity with your annoying-ass horn.

Stop being assholes, people. Please, be considerate of others.

Published by Twindaddy

Sometimes funny. Sometimes serious. Always genuine.

25 thoughts on “A Neighbor’s Rant”

  3. My old subdivision…the same thing. Location, I suppose. But I remember so many times when my girl was a wee baby and she was woke up by loud obnoxious horns (and those who thought their “rice rockets” sounded great – to me it was like a sick wind up toy).
    I hate people. – Jain

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  5. I don’t really have that problem (most of the teens have moved away to college). But what I do have is those ijits who cannot find their own driveways and thus park in the street. They park far to close to my driveway and thus it is always an obstacle course to leave in the morning.

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    1. I get that, too. People park on both corners so when I pull out into my street I have no idea if a car is coming and will kill me. So I have to pull out slowly and hope no one is coming. Sigh…

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  6. That was one of the basic things I was taught as a kid. We all carpooled, and someone was always expected to get out and knock on the door. Always.

    And as you pointed out, with cell phones today, ummm, why be an asshole? Unless, of course, you ARE an asshole. Then stay out of my damn neighborhood.

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  8. Might I suggest dropping an egg on their windshield? It’s a very time-effective solution to express your displeasure with those people who prioritize their convenience to the detriment of others.

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  9. One of my favorite parts of spring and fall is ice cream. It’s not too hot to put something heavy in your tummy, and it’s not too cold to eat something that will leave you shivering. But if someone were blaring their horn while I was enjoying the creamy deliciousness, I would shove my cone up their nose.

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Deposit 2 cents here